Cirque Du Soleil, Totem

This was, without questions, the most amazing live performance of any kind I have ever seen, and likely will ever see, in my entire life. The art direction, music, and feats all worked together to melt my face off.

The challenge in reviewing something of this nature is in decided which part is best. There were so many acts that came up to the bleeding edge of what the human body is physically capable of doing, and what the psyche is able to release self-preservation to attempt. Also, they made fun of Italians, and that fills me with great joy.

If anyone has ever said about Cirque: "I can't explain it, you just have to go see it" Trust them. There's a chance that they aren't mentally deficient, it might not be the lack of knowing the proper words. I would say that, at least in the English language, there's no good way to define the extreme heights of live entertainment that the team behind Totem have achieved without dropping excessive expletives, gesturing madly, then just giving up and saying: "I can't explain it, you just have to go see it"

Now that we've covered that, here's the bad, dramatized for your convenience.

Are you sweating from the temperature?
-Yes
Would you like to spend $6 on a cold water?
-No
How about a "beer"? Bud light is a meager $7
-Thanks, I'll pass...
We've got Stella Artois, $8.50
-Seriously, knock it off. I'm not spending $8.50 on a below average beer
Well, why don't you just go out of the tent to cool off during the 30 minute intermission?
-Finally a bit of good advice... aw, what the hell man? People have to smoke right outside the tent openings? Does the Maryland law about distance from doors apply to tents?
Fine, be that way, Just go sit in your tiny plastic seat that is uncomfortably close to the people on either side of you.

You should attend this show.

 If you are blind, you should not... but I recommend the soundtrack.